I wrote you a poem once
about salmon fighting currents,
tire sandals, and Kenyan dust
it was less about you
and more about that pacing wild
you owned
the thing I never understood
I wrote it
after you left me without words
for once
on my front steps
I had an answer for you
I didn’t say. but
it was less about want
and more
about timing
which was
as always with us
off
Susan Daniels Poetry 
love the tag. 🙂
Hee, hee. Thanks. An ancient memory.
memories are funny aren’t they? geez…come out of nowhere and smack right in the eye.
Yes, they do. This one was fun, though.
…memory surfaces…
lovely–
Thanks, JCC. An old, really dusty one!
Reblogged this on Spontaneous Creativity.
timing def is important…interesting…i think the wildness you saw in them as alluring def can be…as it breaks through our normalcy at times…and can be refreshing…though again it always comes back to timing…
It certainly does. Fun memory, though!
Love this Susan… and the little wordplay at the very end…
off – Love it
Thanks, Bjorn. I couldn’t resist…
Love this–everything about it works for me–
Audrey, thank you! I had fun with this one–hit me all at once.
hmmmm….really good poetry comes from “bad” timing.:)
-Jennifer
Thanks, Jennifer. Always just a little bit off, but I don’t know if I would call anything about it bad, ever 😉
The opening hooked me- what a great start. And the ending- pitch perfect.
Thank you!
Timing…Is Everything…and I loved the quirky tilt to this, adding the perfect off-time.
Thank you, Rhonda–glad the quirks worked for you!
“It was less about want and more about timing.” I definitely understand that! I like the style you used to write this poem. Very effective.
Thank you, Mary. Had to be a little off-kilter and enjambed 😉
Off. Like.
Thanks, Nelle!
Funny how in some relationships the timing always seems to be off ~ cool write, Susan.
Thanks, Polly. Yeah, sometimes timing really is everything.
I like how so much that wasn’t still did not eclipse how much was.
Oh, I love how you put that–thanks!
A beautiful poem!
Thanks, Ayala!
Missed timing has been the story of my life, Very nicely put.
Thanks, Henry. The story of mine, too, sometimes.
this builds beautifully..unwraps in the going…it was less about want
and more
about timing….great…
Thanks, Claudia. This was a fun one.
timing and relationships!….the last word …off! in so few words an insight into this pairing of opposites..great…thankyou
Thank you Geraldine. I really enjoyed this one, the creating of it.
“…more about that pacing wild you owned” Fabulous line!
Oh, thank you much! Wish I knew what had become of the original poem I wrote. Sigh.
How I understand the offness in relationships. I really like that use of refrain and shifting from what is not to what is. Very nice piece.
Oh, thank you Yousei.
I really love this. The not understanding. The being left on the front porch. Wistful and lovely.
Jenny, thanks.
Timing … or the lack of it … lies at the heart of so much, from the witty riposte to being in the right place at the right time to meet the right person.
That’s so true, Tony. How many of us, hours later, come up with the right response?
Oh, this is so good… Yes, I know that place, timing really is everything. I love the way you broke the lines, really added to the rhythm.
Kelly, thank you!
“I wrote it
after you left me without words
for once”
That’s my favorite line… I always feel empty when left without words. Nicely done.
Thank you, Amber!