what it means, uncovering what’s hidden

Posted in dverse poetry prompt, New Free Verse by

your hair was long
when we met, hippy hair
my mother called it
carbon-dating herself
or estimating age
in tree rings; polished
brown chestnut, curling slightly
to tease your neck
where it met your shoulders

I braided it for you once,
a French braid, laughing
& then loosed it
with my fingers, saying
I would not walk
holding hands
with a man
whose hair
was prettier than mine

prophetic, you looked
with that beard;
old testament,
but not shouting warnings
or sacrificing sons;
just murmuring seduction
masked as wisdom
through the unexpected redness
of your lips, the sensuality
of your mouth

a year later,
you shaved it, all of it–
hair, beard, mustache
& I saw for the first time
how your chin pushed forward
your stubbornness,
& the sharp angles of your jaw–
why, I asked,
my fingertips tracing circles
on the new nakedness of your scalp,
cupping the curve of your cheek
in my palm

you would not say it
at first

it was the crazy guy,
the one you always bought breakfast for
the mornings you walked
to the diner
who figured it out

repentance, he called it.
penance, you said.

***my offering for Dverse poetry prompt today, where we are describing character.  Could think of nothing but the ex who shaved his head for this one :)  Come join us–the fun starts at 3.

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69 thoughts on “what it means, uncovering what’s hidden”

  4. “just murmuring seduction
    masked as wisdom
    through the unexpected redness
    of your lips, the sensuality
    of your mouth”

    and you seduce us here too,
    you him, she, and his pretty hair
    so I/we are so shocked by the repentance.

    Bravo!!

  5. I like the way the secrets play in this, the ambiguities, as well as the mainline descriptions which are extremely well written and character-fleshing(as it were.) Always something more to dip from that classic well that is behind so much writing, appearance versus reality. And its amazing how much of our ‘identity’ is there in our hair and style–we almost become someone else when we change it.

  6. It is such a huge shock to see someone we think we know so well undergo a complete change especially without saying anything to anyone too. A gripping, very interesting read Susan.

  8. What a fascinating concept – shows that it’s not just us women who get emotionally (and metaphorically) tied up in our hair.
    Oh and I totally agree with you about guys with hair prettier than ours!

  9. “just murmuring seduction
    masked as wisdom
    through the unexpected redness
    of your lips, the sensuality
    of your mouth”

    Love these lines too, love all of it!

    It is strange how the addition or loss of hair on our menfolk change their whole appearance and how we view them…

    Anna :o ]

    • Anna–thank you for liking my offering.

      Agree with your comment re. hair–and this was such a radical thing, it had to mean more than simply a –hey–time to change my look moment for him.

  10. wow really strong closure on this….the penance/repetence…ha on the no hair prettier than yours….just murmuring seduction
    masked as wisdom….really nice line there….could really see them……and then to undergo such change too…the stubborness of the jaw is a great touch too…

  30. HAH! I LOVE long hair on men. The beginning of this holds a memory of happiness and by the end I am left deeply sad. Your word choices and play with Biblical themes worked beautifully.

  31. I relate to this so much at the end of the 80′s became clean shaven, short hair no leathers only hawaiin shirt and chino’s nobody recognized me at first maybe you need to transform so completely a short of shedding and this poem conveys it so well

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